Monday, October 22, 2012

Review: Girl vs. Monster

My favourite time of the year is fall and winter seasons. The warm cute clothes, the holidays, and the really bad movies that ABC Family, Lifetime, and Disney Channel play, so when I saw the trailer for Girl vs. Monster on Disney Channel I set the recording immediately, anticipating the hilarious dumb crap that would ensue. And boy was I right. First off Disney Channel had to have a warning at the beginning of it that had, and I quote, " 'woah', 'oh my gosh', and 'I didn't see that coming' moments." in it. My brother, Fraser, and I, being the only ones in the living room at the moment, looked at each other with a "is this a real warning sign or am I going insane" look. So we watched the movie. Wow! it had all the things in the Disney Channel Criteria For A Movie Book. 

So I talk a lot about movies and TV but I never really have posts on my opinions on lots of them. so I thought I might start some review posts when I see a good or terrible movie or TV show. And yes I'm starting with the terrible. So here goes.

1. Lead actor/actress being shy but desperate for the attention of their significant other.

2. A adult who puts light on the fact that "you're not a kid any more you're a 'young adult'."

3. A musical number(either one at the end, or multiple throughout the movie)

4. A boy/girl who is either popular, and hates it, or the indie music kid who just wants everyone in high school to treat each other the same, because there's no difference from the popular kid and the nerd, because, let's face it, they dress the same and are both self conscious about the way they are perceived  blah, blah, blah, and all the rest of that feel good crap.

5. A non-threatening bad guy/lady who really just needs to be ignored, and they'll go away.

6. A jock who is also a bully.

7. A bitchy popular girl, who believes in the  High school  hierarchy, and that you can't hang out with people that are beneath you. But who eventually gets their comeuppance, but not purposefully, because that would set a bad example.

8. a song from a  Disney Channel star they are pushing, even if said star is not in the movie.

9.An actor that is in  almost everything, but plays bit characters, so all you can do is go "I know you from something", and IMDB them

There are more, but I momentarily forgot them( if you can think of them I'd love to hear what you've got), but basically if you have all those things, you have the materials to make a Disney Channel Movie.

So getting back to the point of this post. A review.

The movie started off okay-ish. The main character, Skylar(played by Olivia Holt(Kickin' It)is completely  fearless to the point where it's almost like she can't compute the emotion at all, and a gymnast. She has over protective parents, who have a secret, and a basement that is off limits. she thinks they're evil, but that they're mold scientists, and nothing more. She wants to go to a party on Halloween, and they say no*shifty eyes, shifty eyes*, they feel bad that she isn't getting what she wants, but get her a babysitter, who is Cobb their colleague, played by the hilarious Adam Chambers.

All in all it was a normal sappy, family oriented Disney Channel Movie, that was basically just an excuse for Disney channel actors to sing, with a sound track of mostly Chyna Anne McClain, and Olivia Holt songs, that had a message about over coming your fears.

I'd give it 1 1/2 stars for the effort of being not like most Disney Channel movies. Because it wasn't as lame when it comes to the Halloween aspect, but it still had the Disney wholesomeness, that they all need. 

1 comment:

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